Negative Feedback to a Team Member

C.U.B.E. for Conflict

To learn more about CUBE and how to use, please view the CUBE Overview

Best Practices for Negative Feedback to a Team Member

  • The goal is for everyone to be calm, centered, and connected. 
  • Assume they have positive intentions around their actions and what happened.
  • Share your positive intent and support for them and your commitment to their success. 
  • Request a conversation to give them some feedback and find ways to increase their effectiveness.
  • Find a good time for you both to have the conversation.

C

REATE CONTEXT & OBJECTIVES

  • Be soft on the person, hard on the problem.
  • Share a plus/delta--where you were satisfied and where you weren’t around the tasks or projects. Do not generalize and make it about them.
  • Be clear about the impact on you and the severity of the situation.
  • Own your assessments. Separate facts from interpretations.
  • Ask them how they see it. Appreciate the other person’s view of the situation even if it’s inaccurate or sounds like an excuse. 
  • Stay curious about what you did to contribute to the situation.
  • Create a shared reality and take responsibility for your roles.

NDERSTAND EACH OTHER’S WORLDS… THEIR WORLD FIRST

U

  • Co-create many possible solutions to resolve the situation.
  • Discuss how to reduce variability in the result and increase communication.
  • Also discuss how to handle it if (and when) it happens again.

B

RAINSTORM OPTIONS

  • Decide and fully align on clear next steps. Agree to specific actions to deal with the situation if (and when) it happens again.
  • Setup a check-in to discuss changes, progress, and course corrections.
  • Reconfirm your support for the other person.
  • Work together to make it happen and stay in communication.

E

ND WITH COMMITMENTS

Common Mistakes for Negative Feedback to a Team Member

  • Going in off-center, in bad timing/location, or when anyone is ready to “snap.”
  • Assuming negative intent or making generalizations or attributions.
  • Forgetting that the goal is to collaborate around a change in behavior, not to deliver a message or beat them up.
  • Not acting from a mood of support and encouragement.
  • Being too nice and not naming the real intent of the conversation.
  • Not being prepared.

C

REATE CONTEXT & OBJECTIVES

  • Waiting to address it as a theme about them, rather than addressing it as specific feedback around a task--making it about them, rather than their behavior.
  • Assuming it’s “their fault” and not looking at how you contributed.
  • Getting caught up in your own story and not being curious. It’s easy to want to be “right” rather than focus on the desired result.
  • Not understanding or empathizing with their challenges, obstacles or other uncontrollable factors.
  • Not sharing the level of impact on you or the severity of the consequences.
  • Assuming what’s easy for you is easy for others.

NDERSTAND EACH OTHER’S WORLDS… THEIR WORLD FIRST

U

  • Making demands rather than exploring next steps together. 
  • Not exploring options for offering continued support and resources.

B

RAINSTORM OPTIONS

  • No clear next steps or check-ins to accelerate the learning.
  • Approaching this as their issue rather than your issue.
  • Underestimating the possibility of a radical shift.
  • Overestimating your ability to quickly replace the person.

E

ND WITH COMMITMENTS

View the Cube Prep Sheet in Google Doc.

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