Influence and Problem Solving

C.U.B.E. for Conflict

To learn more about CUBE and how to use, please view the CUBE Overview

Best Practices for Influence and Problem Solving

  • Establish an open and collaborative mood.  Center yourself in this mood.
  • Clarify the goal of the conversation—focus on the shared, desired outcome.
  • Be soft on the person and hard on the problem. Care about them personally, but also name the elephant in the room and challenge directly.
  • Create the agenda and timing together.
  • Ensure the right people are included from the start.	

C

REATE CONTEXT & OBJECTIVES

  • Be curious: Dig for underlying interests, priorities, and feelings.
  • Stay curious. See dissent as an opportunity to learn.
  • Paraphrase to ensure you heard correctly and demonstrate understanding.
  • Share your interests and priorities.
  • Synthesize: List shared priorities and differences.

NDERSTAND EACH OTHER’S WORLDS… THEIR WORLD FIRST

U

B

RAINSTORM OPTIONS

  • Set a mood of creativity: Clarify you are brainstorming, not decision-making.
  • Co-create many possible solutions.
  • Expand ideas: Do not narrow into one solution.
  • Redirect critiques back to brainstorming.

ND WITH COMMITMENTS

  • Decide and commit to clear next steps (who is doing what by when).
  • Be obstinate about your vision & interests, flexible about tactics.
  • Move the ball down the field with small steps.
  • Ensure everyone fully commits even if they disagree.
  • Setup a check-in, milestone or next conversation.
  • Write an email to summarize the decisions and commitments that were made.

E


Common Mistakes for Influence and Problem Solving

  • Trying to get to agreement too quickly (1 step forward, 2 steps back).
  • Being too nice and not naming the real intent of the conversation.
  • Unilateral moves including setting up an agenda without a discussion.
  • Having the conversation in the wrong circumstances.
  • Underestimating the importance of mood, e.g. moving forward before cleaning up trust issues.

REATE CONTEXT & OBJECTIVES

C

U

NDERSTAND EACH OTHER’S WORLDS… THEIR WORLD FIRST

  • Expecting to be heard before hearing the other person.
  • Solving problems based on solidified positions rather than underlying interests.
  • Believing you understand what’s important to them without confirming  your assumptions.
  • Not empathizing with their perspective, especially when you disagree.
  • Not explicitly sharing your interests and priorities.
  • Focusing on the first solution that seems the best rather than fully exploring possibilities.
  • Judging, critiquing or ignoring ideas while brainstorming. Not gently correcting when others critique or judge.
  • Throwing out ideas without caveating that you are just exploring.

RAINSTORM OPTIONS

B

ND WITH COMMITMENTS

  • Walking away with two different ideas of next steps.
  • Accepting unrealistic commitments or withholding concerns.
  • Thinking too big rather than just focusing on the next step.
  • Not personally thanking people for what worked in the conversation.

E

View the Cube Prep Sheet in Google Doc.

How did you do with having this conversation?

View the Post-Conversation Self Assessment.